Being alt shouldn’t feel like wearing sandpaper.

Sadly, most gothic fashion is a sensory nightmare. You see a badass outfit online, you’re so excited it comes in your size, but the second you put it on, the betrayal starts.

The armpits pinch when you lift your arms. The waistband digs in when you sit down. You’re sweating, overstimulated, and losing your patience, especially if you’re like me and have to change your outfit five times before you’re finally satisfied with the fit.

You aren’t looking cunt; you’re just fucking miserable. By the time you finally walk out the door, you’re already ready to turn around and go home because you've reached your spoon limit before the day even started.

From uncomfortable to sensory-safe

In my 20s, I could rock any height of platform heel, uncomfortable belts, and super tight skirts because I was usually drunk enough to distract myself from my body. Now that I don’t really drink, I have nothing to ignore the discomfort.

I’m 5’10” and 274 lbs, I want to feel like a little kid in my dad's oversized clothes, but most brands stop at an XL.

I built Letter Shoppe back in 2013 because I wanted comfy alt fashion essentials. The stuff you grab out of the laundry basket the second it’s ready because it feels like a second skin.

My designer's standard: My 2-week cozy test

If you look at my shop, you’ll notice I only use the same three or four blanks for everything. That’s because I am a typical Virgo perfectionist when it comes to testing fabric for my brand.

Before a single design gets realesed, I put the blank through a 2-week sensory audit.

This means, I wear them multiple times a week, I wash them repeatedly, and I obsess over whether a single thread is scratching me.

If it doesn't pass my personal neuro-spicy standards, it never sees the light of day.

Here are the tips I’ve learned as a fashion designer making leisurewear for alternative bodies that you can use to audit your own closet:

Tip 1: Know your sensory profile (The hug vs. the little kid)

Every neurodivergent brain is different. Some people need deep pressure with their clothes that feel like a constant, tight hug to keep anxiety down. Others (like me) need to feel weightless.

• The "little kid" vibe: I love things oversized and baggy. That’s why my brand goes up to 5X in everything. Even though I’m usually a 2X, I usually want a 4X because I want that feeling of being small, even when I am very not.

• The "hug" vibe: Know how tight you like things. If you need that secure feeling, look for high-quality stretch that stays put without pinching, and opt out of ribbed or textured options that might irritate your skin after a few hours.

Tip 2: The stimmy shimmy touch test

Don’t just stand there like a mannequin in the dressing room. Close your eyes and purely think about how that fabric feels against your skin.

• The Stimmy Shimmy: Put on your headphones, close your eyes, and do a one-minute stimmy shimmy to the music. Shake your body up a little! It’s okay to look weird in the dressing room if it saves you money on something that was just going to rot in the back of your closet for a year. If you feel it rubbing the wrong way or pinching while you move, into the discard pile it goes.

• The Sitting Test: Every dressing room should have a bench for this exact reason. Things fit when you’re standing; they betray you when you sit. That’s why all my stretchy bottoms are made from comfy sweatpants fabric or high-stretch blends. Even if I binge on Thanksgiving, they won’t dig into my belly button.

• The Crack-Proof Rule: Yes, bend over and see if your butt shows. As a Millennial, I have traumatic flashbacks of sitting at the lunch table and accidentally flashing my thong to the jocks behind me. Never again. It’s the main reason every cunty bottom I make is high-waisted. You should be able to sit or bend over without showing your crack or feeling your pants slide down.

Tip 3: Make your own style rules

Don’t just mindlessly follow a Pinterest board or an influencer with a "dream closet." You have to figure out what works for you. Not just how things feel physically, but how they make you feel emotionally.

The right outfit can make or break your confidence. I know when I leave the house with a face full of makeup and an outfit that isn’t triggering my sensory issues, I feel fucking unstoppable.

Here is my personal checklist:

• Skip the Plain Basics: You will rarely catch me in a plain white tee. For me to be happy, something has to stand out. Whether it’s clashing patterns, extra layers, or a graphic that screams my opinions from the rooftops. 

• The Messy Eater Rule: The majority of the shirts I design are black for a very specific reason: I don't always know where my mouth is when I eat. I will stain a white t-shirt. Know your habits! If you’re a messy eater, embrace the dark side so you don't have to stress about a drop of mustard ruining your day.

• Pop Your Colors: Being goth or alt doesn't mean you’re trapped in a black-only void. My personal favorites are yellow and red (not together, mind you). A pop of color against an all-black closet keeps things from feeling stagnant.

• The Weird Look Metric: I live in a very red area of a small town in Michigan. Lately, I’ve been living in activist apparel. When I go out and get weird looks for a Yeehaw, Fuck the Law or Become Ungovernable tee, it just tells me I wore the perfect outfit. If your clothes make the right people uncomfortable, you’re doing it right.

Tip 4: Can I nap in it tho?

The only clothes I sleep in these days are the ones I made. If I can’t take a nap in it, or doom scroll for hours under the sheets without giving my outfit a second thought, I’m fucking winning! But if I wake up feeling trapped or tangled in my own clothes, it’s an automatic fail.

Especially lately with the Michigan snow, I just want to stay in one outfit all day. Changing clothes is a transition, and transitions are overstimulating. You should be able to look cute in public and stay cozy in bed without having to change.

Tip 5: Laundry secrets 

Clothes only pill if you wash them wrong. I’ve had some of the pieces I’ve made for over a decade because I follow these strict rules to keep them from turning into sandpaper.

• Cold Water Only: Heat is the enemy. It kills graphics, shrinks your fit, and causes that annoying pilling.

• Wash Inside Out: Always flip your graphic tees before they hit the machine. This ensures a rogue zipper or something hard in the laundry doesn't tear at the design.

• The Anti-Forgetful Air-Dry: I have a bunch of hangers right above my washer and dyer because nothing beats air drying. I prefer it because my neurodivergent brain will forget things are in the dryer. If I leave them there, I inevitably have to dry them all over again just to get the wrinkles out. Hanging them up saves me from that twice-dried cycle of shame.

• If You MUST Use the Dryer: If you absolutely have to, use the low tumble setting only. Less heat equals a longer life for your favorite badass pieces to stay soft.

Audit your closet sanctuary

This weekend, hyper-focus on your wardrobe. If a piece doesn't pass the this Cozy Test, put it in a donate pile.

• The Swap: Try to give them to your neurotypical friends who aren't texture-sensitive, or better yet, host a closet swap. Their "too tight" might be your safe hug.

• The 10% Rule: It’s okay to keep that 10% of super sexy but uncomfortable clothes for when you really want to rock it, but the rest should be your go-to essentials.

Even if your closet is reduced by half, your freedom to exist comfortably is worth it. You'll find that getting dressed in the morning is a thousand times better when everything you own feels like a hug.